You see your body every day: in the mirror, shop windows, your mind’s eye. While it’s normal to look in the mirror when you’re getting ready for your day, or feel your body to, for example, see if there are bruises or bites, some people find themselves doing these things much more often.
At a certain point, it becomes unhealthy. It’s a form of obsessing over the look and feel of the body and it’s common for people with body dysmorphia and eating disorders to engage in body checking in a more extreme way.
In this blog article, you will learn:
- What body checking and mirror checking are
- How body checking relates to body image and self esteem
- The connection between body checking and eating disorders
- Skills for stopping body checking behaviors
Related: Learn more about body dysmorphia here.
Body checking and mirror checking are not exclusive to those with eating disorders. It’s a common problem in an image obsessed society, one that is damaging to self esteem. However, it is entirely possible to stop.
Defining Body Checking and Mirror Checking
Body checking involves obsessive thoughts and behaviors about appearance. Body checking is a common habit in those with body dysmorphia or eating disorders, which is the obsession over one’s imagined “flaws or defects.” The obsession is often over one’s weight and/or a certain part of the body.
As a way to cope with anxiety about their bodies, many people with body dysmorphia, eating disorders, or even Obsessive Compulsive Disorder constantly “check” (touch, grab, look at, compare) the parts of the body that they are worried about. This is to make sure an imagined problem doesn’t become more prominent. People also check to see if unhealthy habits used to change imagined flaws appear to be making an impact.
BODY CHECKING BY FEELING THE BODY
When people obsess over something about their body, they may constantly monitor it to make sure it hasn’t changed, or if it has minimized in their mind. For example, a person may constantly feel or measure the shape or their legs, how they look when walking, sitting, standing. They could become hyper aware of how their body fits in clothing, and whether that has changed over time. Recent social media trends have centered around monitoring the circumference of one’s wrist or size of the waist.
Males often present with body dysmorphia concerning muscle mass, as society expects them to be muscular. Muscle, especially in males, is often equated with fitness level, which is highly valued in society. A male may body check by constantly feeling their muscles, measuring them with tape measures, or noticing how they look when walking, running or flexing. This behavior of course is not exclusive to males and can pertain to anyone engaged in fitness, body-building, or other forms of exercise.
Related: Learn more about body dysmorphia in males here.
In general, body checking by feeling can include:
- Frequent weighing
- Measuring body parts with the hands or tape measure
- Feeling for fat, muscle, or bone
- Pinching or squeezing parts of the body
- Repeatedly evaluating how one fits in clothing
- Comparing the body to other peoples’ bodies
- Constantly needing reassurance from others about their size
MIRROR CHECKING BY OBSESSING OVER REFLECTIONS
Body checking can also present as mirror checking, which is the compulsive examination of one’s reflection to monitor certain parts of the body. Your reflection is everywhere, so there are many ways to mirror check. A common example is checking your reflection as you’re walking past shop windows. It becomes easy to obsess over how you look when you’re walking, and how you look in comparison to everyone else walking around you.
Mirror checking can look like:
- Staring into the mirror for long periods of time to assess physical features
- Comparing current pictures with pictures of themselves from the past
- Frequently (often daily) taking pictures to monitor changes in appearance
- Comparing oneself to others on social media
Why is body checking harmful?
First and foremost, body checking is a result of imagined flaws in the body. It’s easy, then, to imagine these flaws as becoming bigger over time. It’s easy for body image to become distorted and vastly different from what someone actually looks like. The best outcome of body checking is that the perceived problem hasn’t changed. But often, the problem may appear to become worse, which causes more anxiety and obsession, even guilt.
BODY CHECKING AND EATING DISORDERS
There are many causes of eating disorders, but a common contributing factor is perfectionism. Perfectionists often hyper-focused on the body and how to “perfect” it. This includes trying to achieve the “perfect body,” in terms of weight, shape, and/or size. In the mind of a perfectionist, there is no room for perceived flaws.
Related: Find out more about the relationship between eating disorders and perfectionism here.
In an effort to control or change the body, perfectionists and people with body dysmorphia in general turn towards unhealthy habits like restriction and excessive exercise. If during body checking, these efforts don’t seem to work, guilt and anxiety fuels a person to further engage in behaviors. Suddenly, body checking has contributed and fuels a full blown eating disorder.
Related: When does exercise become damaging? Read about exercise dependence here.
How to Stop Body Checking
A really common form of body obsession is about weight and compulsively stepping on the scale. It’s not easy to stop weighing yourself. But therapists usually recommend throwing out your scale and doing “blind weighing,” which is when you are not told or able to see your weight whenever you are weighed.
It’s not exactly possible to completely avoid your body or reflection, and in fact, body avoidance is another harmful behavior when it comes to body image. But in early recovery, you might hang fabric over your mirror to take away the temptation, or take mirrors out of your room altogether. It is possible, however, to reduce, and eventually eliminate, the complete preoccupation with weight and shape. If you (or someone you know) engages in body checking, here’s how to stop.
1. BEGIN TO NOTICE HOW MUCH YOU ENGAGE IN BODY CHECKING.
A lot of times when you’re body checking, you don’t even realize you’re doing it. Idly feeling parts of the body while sitting, or staring at your reflection while you’re walking, can be so ingrained that you really don’t even notice it anymore.
Consider carrying a journal, or just noting in your phone, how many times a day you find yourself body or mirror checking. How long do you spend engaging in these behaviors? Notice how much of your time preoccupation with your body takes up.
Once you’re aware of it, start asking yourself:
- What am I going to get out of this?
- How do I feel after body checking?
- How does it impact my behavior?
- Are these thoughts benefitting me in any way?
2. SEEK HELP FROM A THERAPIST TO START REDUCING BEHAVIORS.
A therapist can help you reflect on the root cause of body checking —whether it’s low self-esteem, body dysmorphia, an eating disorder, etc. They can also help you plan out how to physically reduce and eventually stop body and mirror checking. It’s important to note that if you compulsively engage in these behaviors, it’s not likely that you’ll just stop “cold turkey.” Like treatment for any other disorder, it will take time to heal the relationship between the mind and body.
To stop body checking, you and your therapist may first determine two to three areas you feel would be most helpful to target.
You’ll then work on:
- Reducing: For example, if you body check twelve times a day, you’ll work to reduce it to six times by your next session.
- Limiting: For example, only looking in the mirror in the morning when preparing for school or work, and in the evening before going to bed (times when it’s natural to be in the bathroom).
- Postponing: For example, not body checking until you get home from school or work and working down from there.
- Eliminating: Such as, donating clothes that no longer fit you, or deleting old photos.
Start with easier goals, and make changes gradually. Focus on different areas as time goes on. Again, you probably won’t stop all body checking behaviors overnight.
3. DEVELOP COPING SKILLS TO USE WHEN THE URGE TO BODY CHECK COMES UP.
Reducing and eliminating body checking behaviors is hard. You should have some strategies to cope with urges to reach your body checking elimination goals.
Here are some techniques or coping skills that you may implement:
- Use distractions like watching TV, doing crafts, or calling a friend to postpone urges.
- Create mantras to repeat when you feel the urge to body check, something like: “I am more than my body.”
- Write down positive affirmations on post-it notes and put them on your mirror.
- Use your DBT and emotion regulation skills in times of high anxiety and distress.
Along the way, be sure to recognize and celebrate your progress! These are recovery wins, and you’ll be making strides towards cultivating a healthy relationship with your body.
If you or a loved one is suffering from an eating disorder, take the first step today and talk to someone about recovery or simply learn more about the holistic eating disorder recovery programs we offer.
